Love, Life, and Passion

So yes a lot has happened since my last blog post a very long time ago. Love, life, and passion. Wow just like in the title. Bwahahahaha.

So whats first? Right the "L" word LOVE. Yes I have love in my life. For my kids who live a very far distance from me. And for special people in my life who have seen me through some of the tough times in the past few years. And one very special person who has been there through almost all of the same crap I have. But this person has experienced more and has had more patience than I have ever had.

Whats next ? Right LIFE. So since last time I have written something personal I have tried to get out of my regular routine and try different things to get back into the swing of things. I have found it very difficult and still feel out of sorts to getting out and meeting people.

Lastly there's PASSION. Well I feel I have lost passion since the divorce for a bunch of things. My job some days. My side business which is similar to my everyday job. The ability to get back into the flow of things.

 I feel out of sorts and like I stand out. It seems less than at the beginning of my divorce but there are still some feelings there. Less of a feeling of people staring at me when eating alone at a restaurant. Or standing alone watching a band at a music jam. And other social gatherings.

I do know I have a passion for something I cannot admit publicly yet. Its a very secretive thing that I would love to scream out loud and tell everyone, but not right now. I have to let the passion grow and enjoy the ride. 

So where am I in my life? Right where I am supposed to be......for now.

Ciao for now

Why have I Stopped Writting for a While

Since my last post has been over a year ago all of the above have taken my interest away from writing. A little bit of me was not sure about my writing and I am still a little leery about sharing my ramblings. Especially with so many bloggers out there who make this their passion and truly make a mark in the blogging world.

 Life is a very interesting thing with many distractions. Work, play, poker, relationships, and whatever else takes your mind off of reality for a while. I have done all of these and still haven't found my comfy place in the world of the divorced men's group in this city. So what's a guy to do to feel their worth and live the best they can within the city? This is where you can speak up now.

I have been thinking too much about where my future lies lately though. From an outside perspective there are many different possibilities I could look into to change my future. But right now I need to be here and see this path I am on right now through until I know I am at a dead end.

 Will I be back to blogging? Yes. Frequently? No. So bear with me because I am a radically infrequent blogger. Maybe next time something a little more personal or funny. I just have to get back into the swing of all this again. Ciao for now

How Quickly a Life Can Change

I have been thinking long and hard about a close friend who has been going through a very rough and stressful time right now.

She is usually a strong and vibrant person who can handle anything. And from the outside looks like she has all her shit together. And recently found out she was pregnant and was very happy to share the news with everyone.

Well the worst of all things happened and she started to bleed, and throughout the day eventually lost the poor little life that was growing inside her.

This brings about some questions that have been racing through my head. Yes even I have periods of deep thought and contemplation.

So why is it when you have a very happy event happen in your life, does the opposite reaction have to happen to even out the "ying and yang" in our lives? Why can't happy things happen over and over? It seems like that is very unfair to have to have this balance in our lives. We deserve more like %80 positive and %20 negative so we can feel like were getting ahead in life.

Is this too much to ask? Is that greedy of us to want to have more positive than negative? Does this have to do with some "Secret" that we don't know about like in the movie with the same title? I don't know about you but I tried to apply the thoughts and ideas in that movie and that didn't help at all. In fact that's when the worst of the stuff in my life happened.(You will have to read way back to older posts to see what that was)

So in this even 50/50,"ying & yang" theory my friend then has to have an amazing bit of good luck coming to her that should last her til she reaches 80 years old. Right? Because one of the worst experiences in our adult lives has to be losing a child.

Which brings me to my last point. I have been trying to think of something to say to her that means that my heart goes out to her and that I understand the pain she is going through. And to express that all needs something more. Something that has a bigger and deeper emphasis on how important it is that she understands I am here along with everyone else to help her through this dark period.

But all I can think of is "sorry". A word that has a simple meaning and doesn't really have much punch or pizazz to it. It is sort of an indifferent word to me that doesn't have the deep meaning that needs to be conveyed. But I guess it has to do for now.

While she is going through this very dark day, I am sure all her friends and family hope she has good health and gets the peace and rest she needs to get through this hard time. I know we are all sending her our best wishes.

Ciao for now

Dating - Crazies need not apply!

Ok so now your single and looking to see what other options are out there for you. You do the Plenty of Fish thing. Maybe E Harmony or maybe even try to connect to the alternative lifestyles of Fetlife.com.

But what is the first thing that runs through your head as soon as you meet that person?

Hey he/she has a nice ass? They are so pretty? Am I attractive enough for them? Can I do better than this?

No I think the first thing you think about after a relationship/divorce is very primal and simple.

Is this person in any way shape or form like my ex? I will drive this car straight into a wall if they remind me of him/her.

Well welcome to your nightmare.

Finding similarities in people that you date with that of your ex is gonna happen and you have to learn to accept that. And as long as it isn't anything like bodily harm (unless asked for...wink wink) the little things shouldn't matter.

Then there is the extreme. The major things that made the relationship collapse in the first place need to be closely looked at and determined if they will blow up in your face again.

Here is an example. If your at his/her place and you see a stack of unopened mail. That's an indication that person may have some issues with paying bills.

If they have a fridge or bathroom that is filthy then maybe we have some issues that may require penicillin. Which means be very careful health wise with this person. Ya don't want bedbugs in your rug. Ya got the message?

Is there an unwillingness from them to pay once in a while for things you do? That may be an indication of being cheap and not feeling that your not worth paying for dinner/movie or some other things.

I guess I could go on but you get the point.

So what do ya do? Just suck it up. People will be the same and you will find traits that are similar from your ex. That's human nature.

Just try to avoid stabbing them with an ice pick in the soft part of their skull right on the top and stirring it like your whisking an omlette when you find those traits.

Ciao for now.

I am BACK!!!!!!!

Ever have a time in your life where you just feel overwhelmed and you feel so lethargic ya just want to sit on the couch,eat fig newtons,masturbate and watch tv? Ok the masturbate thing was a joke. But you know? Just let me do my job and get some rest after feeling? Yeah I have been dealing with that and let this blog thing go way to long.

Ok back on the horse kick my ass in gear and back out there with interesting topics that may be help,hindrance, or even make someone laugh about.

So on that note. Leave me a comment about what you would like to see in upcoming articles in this blog and I will try and get to all of them.

Ciao for now

Anti Abortionists Disgusted Me Today

I am so mad right now I could punch a kitten. This is out of disgust and repulsion at the depths these pro lifers have stooped to shock University of Calgary students into believing their message.

Now I realize that this is a touchy subject with most people and everyone has their side of the line they stand on. That's perfectly okay. Its great to have beliefs and stick to them as much as you want. I will not take a side one way or the other. Because it is not my right to try and persuade you to this side or the other. That's is not why I am angered at these idiots.

I will take a step back and describe what happened to get me so mad.

I was assigned to go to the University of Calgary to shoot and interview an anti abortion display that was in the middle of one of their main court yards. As I approached this display I noticed they were not alone. Across the path from the display was a pro choice group doing their best to give the other side of the argument. Back to the story.

So as I get closer I see that the University put a disclaimer that they didn't approve of the display ahead and that all requests for their display were ignored. For example. They were to turn the pictures inward so people could walk around inside without the images disturbing others walking around the campus. Well they did the opposite despite the requests and the University didn't do anything to correct this. Okay, fine, they were given some leniency.

As I approach the display all the same images of fetuses and aborted bits in a bloody pool were there for all to see. That is the typical images to shock and awe passer by's. Then with a closer look I also see images I couldn't believe they would put with already disturbing pictures.

They actually have now taken their anti abortion campaign and associated it with the genocide of WWII. They had the balls to put pictures of dead Jewish people from the second world war and put them along side these fetuses. REVOLTING. Then I saw a picture of a black man hanging by a noose beside more graphic fetus pictures. What does that have to do with abortions? Go ask the nut bars running the thing.

As a guy who tries to look at every side of a debate I can see the reason why they want to get their message out to the public. It's important to them and I am sure a few people find it very informative and will join their cause. But for them to now take their cues of dirty PR from the disgusting members of PETA revolts me. Taking images of very painful memories and history of one culture and twisting the message for the most dramatic shock value is the lowest of the low. It makes their cause seem dirty and repulsive for anyone who is educated to even want to have the same opinion as them.

The Jewish community are a proud and great culture who were, for lack of better terms, hunted down like animals and exterminated by a viscous German leader who everyone now condemns. To bring those hurtful images together with this filth insults a culture.

And to also associate the hunting and disgraceful hanging of black people with abortions is yet another way of shock value marketing. Twisting the meaning of the image to suit your purposes takes away the very importance of the original image for that culture. For them it screams "Never again". When associated beside the images displayed it takes away that important message for the culture.

I have to say that in past years this group has been vocal and has had their fair share of problems with the university. But they had a responsible message and gave it with a respectful manner. This year was shocking and appalling. Please go back to being respectful to people and your message will not be cluttered with hatred for what your displaying.

And yes the message is important to get out for both sides. All women need to get the right information to make an educated decision about their body and what may grow inside it. They need to know what an abortion is all about. Pro choicers need to be able to give their information too. Fair is fair.

Lets just leave this personal decision to the women please. And leave the dramatic PETA style media bombardment of shocking images home. Thank you.

Ciao for Now

Laptops on your lap

Well yet again I was asked to do a post on a strange new subject. Here it is. Laptops and the effects on your lap.

Well this is gonna be a short one. Get a pillow or a laptop rest for your laptop.

The radiation will make the boys shrivel up and die like the California Raisins. The heat alone can send the crotch temperature so high it will kill the prize micro salmon looking to swim up stream. It seems that when a guy sits his package keeps his legs naturally open which is enough to keep the twig and berries just cool enough to keep the swimmers from dying.So when you put a laptop on a mans lap there isn't an air flow. Then the heat from the laptop will cook the little soldiers. They have also found that prolonged heat from the computer can create a permanent situation down below. So if your scared of the doctor cutting near the marble bag then maybe try and use this technique.

Then again there have been reports of guys trying to do just that and by accident didn't realize that the computer was actually burning their thighs because the computer needs air flow too.

So unless you want dead swimmers in your man jam, Keep the laptop off the family jewels.

Now for women it does not have any effect of the orchid down below. That is according to some of the medical journals I have read through. So the only real danger to women is burning the legs. And that can be helped with one of those computer trays or cooler trays.